Just a Little Thing

This is more for musing than else. I’ve always known that I can’t always have things I want, and that I usually, more often than not, will not get what I want. This has been a common pattern throughout my life, but it’s more evident recently. Of course it upsets me, though I am starting to fall into more of a reluctant acceptance of it. Does my heart still hurt at that? Immensely, especially when I want something rather much. But…I’ll just take it one day at a time, no matter the hurt. Who knows? Maybe things will change one day. Maybe not. But I’ll probably hold out hope for certain things for a good portion of my life, if not all of it.

On the positive side, when it comes to things that I want that solely rely on me and no one else, I am able to reach those goals. Such is the fact that I am able to go to Germany this May if I save right. This makes me happy. While I am not able to get things that involve others, at least I can do things where I am the only ‘real’ factor minus material factors. This is probably why I don’t like relying on others to be honest. I do, but still.

So long as I keep the fact I am reaching one goal in mind, I should be somewhat okay. As much as I wish to change some things, I can’t. So, focus on what I can do and I won’t be too sad. That’s all that matters in the end.