Today has been a long day. A very long, sad day. What makes it worse is that some people don’t even understand why people are so upset. People may be angry, but they’re mostly fearful. It’s one of those things that makes people walk around, dead eyed, and preferring to stay in bed and sleep. My friends and I all slept for a while today.

Classes were canceled or made optional. Everyone was comforting everyone. Kindness was shown when the worst of parts of humanity were revealed.

Trump won the electoral college. Not the popular vote so I don’t understand how that happened, but he did. A lot of people voted for him. And now he won. At first I cried, tried to tell myself it was a dream. Then I just felt nothing. Professor moved a test. Started crying again. Slept. Ate lunch robotically like everyone else. Went back to bed and slept through a class. One friend slept in another’s bed. I don’t think anyone wanted to be left to their own thoughts. Ate dinner. Some people made me smile, however briefly. I was angry again but people showing kindness made me sad once more. And now I’m back to numb.  I want to cry and scream, but I can’t muster the energy and numbness overlays that want.

He won.

I’m not even mad at him. It’s the fact people support him, that they believe what he says. That people are already threatening people already. It’s awful. Hate won. I was always taught that good and love win, but this time… This time there were only small victories, but the big bits were lost. The Senate. Congress. President.

It hurts my soul. And it hurts worse that people don’t even understand why people are upset. We’re upset because we’re afraid. We’re upset because we look to what history has to show us. Walls and people who hate others don’t tend to go well together. We’re afraid for the state of the country and how it will affect the world.

Trump’s win isn’t just about him winning, it’s about how children are afraid of being ‘sent back’ to places they never came from. It’s about how people will feel emboldened and express their hate in words and actions. It’s about how people are already calling suicide lines at a higher rate than usual. I won’t be surprised if anxiety and depression rates climb, too.

I had a dream when I was little where everything was great and wonderful but then years later everything was burning. I thought in my dream I had children and a husband. But it seems that the burning has begun much sooner than expected.


Mugs? Yes, Mugs.

So, considering how looking for a job has not been entirely in my favor as of yet, I have managed to figure something out. Making and selling mugs. My original plan was to try and sell via Facebook, which would mean cheaper and no shipping…but, unfortunately, that is not working either as people are only really liking the pictures I have posted. But I did come up with an idea that will, hopefully, work better. Etsy.

Right now I only have one listing although I have made a couple mugs, but I do also allow for someone to ask for a custom order which I would gladly do. If any one who happens to read this is interested, please feel free to look at the link below and maybe order something if you find yourself so inclined.

Oh, and if you get to it from here, please message me and ask about a code if you want it a bit cheaper.

Oh Dear God…

I was looking Facebook and I so very much hope some quotes I came across that are about ‘Republicans on Rape’ (which is a bit overboard and generalizing, but still) are false. Especially this one:

“If a woman has the right to an abortion, why shouldn’t a man be free to use his superior strength to force himself on a woman? At least the rapist’s pursuit of sexual freedom doesn’t [in most cases] result in anyone’s death.”

Please tell me no one actually thinks like that. The other quotes aren’t much better, some saying rape victims should make the best of a bad situation and that rape is inevitable, but this one… I really hope no one thinks like that. Though some probably do.

Excuse me while I go sob in a corner.

Faith in Humanity Level -100

    I was going to type something else today, but then I scrolled across something on my Facebook feed. It seems that C-Lo Green had sent out some rather…disturbing tweets. He deleted his accounts (and the tweets), and restored his account later, the tweets still gone. But people, of course, took screen shots, and so many of his followers saw it. Putting what he said in non-text speak, “It’s not rape if the person isn’t conscious.”


    I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m pretty sure non-consensual sex is still rape. Even if there isn’t evidence like ‘broken glass’ that would come from a ‘robbery’, there’s still problem some DNA on the poor woman’s body, regardless of condom usage or not. And yes, that was one of his arguments. See, this is one thing that has me lose faith in humanity, but the fact people were rightly pissed off at that, restores my faith a little bit.

    But, think about it, if the people who make laws thought like that? Then what? The women and men who are taken advantage of would not have a voice if they were slipped something or knocked out by some other means. Or, hell, if they were drunk. That would have so many people scarred and without any justice coming their way, no matter what evidence there is.

    So it’s only rape if someone if physically fighting back? Yea, no. Sorry, but that’s an awful way to think.



Sort of an UPDATE: Going to just leave this link here, since one of the blogs I read actually posted something on this exact thing I now see, and it mentions the ‘Yes Means Yes’ law to be implemented in California as well, just in case you’re interested.