I’ve come to some realizations about me, my life, and my future over the past couple years, most of them more recently found than others. I’ve come to accept that I may not get married or have children one day, but that my career is what I want the most and that marriage, or at least a ‘nonlegal’ marriage since marriage recognized by any legal system can take away more benefits than it can give (mostly monetary), is second but still sorely wanted as I crave companionship. I also have realized I might as well just admit some things to myself and fall full in. But I won’t yet because I’m stubborn and have issues. What I have realized, though, is that children aren’t a ‘need’ as some sort of long lasting relationship and career are. Yes, I want kids. Yes, I want to help children. But if it doesn’t happen? I’ll probably be sad and wonder ‘what if’, like with all things, but it won’t be something constantly at the forefront of my mind, only every now and then since I would intend to lead a full life anyhow. But, with that in mind, I’ve always known I have at least wanted to adopt one child of my hopeful two because 1) who wants to go through labor twice and 2) I want to help at least one child who lacks a family.

With this in the back of my mind, I had read something today that only briefly mentioned fostering due to it being relevant to the topic, but that had my think “Hey, if I don’t have kids, I could always foster some until they find a family.” And that sounds like a pretty good deal to me. When I’m better off, I won’t have to worry too much about the monetary cost of having children and fostering more or less would mean that the cost would be even less. I would make a difference in some kid’s life and, while it is vastly different from being a parent, I will still get at least a similar experience.

I still would like to have at least one child if fate would allow ti to be so, but if I can’t…there are other options. So if I can’t have a child because I have no one to have one with or if I am too old by that point that I physically cannot or some other reason, I could at least foster children. Like I said, I would so love to have one of my own little terror, but so long as I can help a child, not jsut with my hopeful career, I’ll be happy. So long as I can love and be loved by a child, I’ll be happy.

Yes, I know, ‘technically’ I shouldn’t worry about children or husbands at my age, I guess, but I like to know where I stand and to have all my ducks in a row before I do anything. So now I know that by the time I’m where I can have a family financially (unless something happens before then, because who knows) I won’t be to concerned with being legally married and I’ll be happy with foster children. Basically I won’t be too surprised if I end up with a really unorthodox family. But I’ll take it or a more ‘normal’ set up, because my heart will be filled with love in either case. More love than it already is.


Adopting Pets

For some reason I’ve been thinking about strays and adopting and all that recently, which has me think of my first dog. I can still remember it near perfect how it was when I first got her. I was maybe about seven, and my family and I went over to a neighbor’s house, the guy being pretty much like an uncle to my brother and I. I don’t know how long it was until I asked where the bathroom was, got directions, and…went tot eh wrong room. I saw a Tweety Bird hanging on the outside of the door, assumed it was the bathroom because my favorite cartoon character was there or so, opened the door and out ran a black and brown dog into the living room. I of course followed. My brother and I pretty much fawned over her and how fluffy she was and how sweet. Considering how old she was, maybe eight or ten by then, it really was amazing how sweet and responding she was to us. My sorta-kinda uncle explained to us how he found her on the road, after having been hit by a car. How he took her in and might have to get rid of her.

And cue the pleading form my brother and I if we could keep her. Our parents said to ask Mr. J (that’s what I’ll call him for now), and we did. And…well, we brought Gypsy home with us. Of course my parents had known ahead of time about the dog and had already said they’d take her and all, but still. Gypsy really was much too sweet for her age, especially with how we were pretty sure she had been living on the street for a while; some of her habits made it obvious. Yes, she clearly had lived with people at some point, but not for a while. Her teeth were a giveaway…and how she may have eaten a baby squirrel once also was a giveaway. But she put up with me and my brother and only really snapped at either of us (my brother) when she was a few years older and had gray on her muzzle and elsewhere. And then, by some miracle and a dog jumping our fence, Gypsy gave us another little furry baby; my current dog, Oreo.

Gypsy clearly loved us. She lived a long time, much longer than most dogs do, for one. And, well, the day that it became evident she was at the end of it all, she waited for my dad to get home. She wanted to say goodbye to each of us, clearly, and she waited for him to come home and see her before she…left. It still makes me tear up now, because she was my childhood pet and I loved her dearly, but the fact she waited for us all… It makes me know that she loved us as much as we loved her.

People tend to not want to adopt older animals, and I get that. But…sometimes they are the sweetest things and the ones that need the most love. Don’t get me wrong, adopting younger dogs is a great thing, too, but people shouldn’t shy away from the older ones because they think they won’t adjust so well. They will. Dogs, well, they’re like people almost. They want love. Yes, some dogs are incapable of being nice and sweet because of everything that happened in their lives, but that’s not all of them. I cannot speak for cats, but I’m sure it’s much the same.

If you’re going to adopt a pet, adopt one that seems to speak to you somehow. Like…it just connects. Don’t worry about its age, it’ll love you all the same. Give the older animals a chance as much as you would give the younger ones.